"If You're Gonna Raise A Drunk"

Below are the lyrics to the newly posted song, "If You're Gonna Raise A Drunk".
John Sebastian (Lovin' Spoonful) played rhythm guitar on this track. When he came out of recording his part, he said, "you've got a hit record there".
Well that would be nice, what the hell is a hit record these days anyway? I think it means the new Blackberry uses it for their latest annoying add, so some folks say, hey, who is that, google the song and download it from limewire.
There is not as much sex and cocaine in that equation as the hit song in the seventies equation had, which one sounds more fun?

I wasn't going to record or play this song originally, I thought it was too corny and sounded like a Jimmy Buffett song. My wife and bass player Daria Grace, said, "oh you have to do that one", "that's the hit". Well apparently, Sebastian thought so too.
Recently, we were playing @ Barbes in Brooklyn to a warm entusiastic crowd. We finished the show and I headed to the bar, a fella walked up to me and said, "hey, great show, I loved that Jimmy Buffett cover you did, what was that song called again?"
Friends, that may have made some say, oh to hell with that song! but I decided instead to embrace it, and take the ride (if any) however strange down that road to margaritaville and have a drink or two, let's see if anybody is left at the bar down there. They may all be partying on Facebook in this new fangled century.

Computerly yours,
Jack



IF YOU'RE GONNA RAISE A DRUNK

Oh yeah it's a real hard job; a real hard job
Cause if you're gonna raise a drunk you might as well do it right
Teach him how to laugh and to always be polite
Make people smile and have a beautiful night
Cause if you're gonna raise a drunk
You might as well do it right

Teach him how to get home quiet, take off his shoes
Know when to shut his mouth so he don't look like a fool
Oh yeah it's a real hard job, a real hard job

And when the summer comes I like that beer by my side
Just to keep things moving along
A couple of mai tais and a Pu Pu Platter
At that place with the dragon in front
I like that frozen margarita while fightin' with the mariachi band
Somewhere in San Francisco

Teach him how to get home quiet, take off his shoes
Know when to shut his mouth so he don't look like a fool
Oh yeah it's a real hard job, a real hard job

And when the summer comes I like that beer by my side
Just to keep things moving along
A couple of mai tais and a Pu Pu Platter
At that place with the dragon in front
I like that frozen margarita while dancin' with the mariachi band
Somewhere in San Francisco

Cause if you're gonna raise a drunk you might as well do it right
Teach him how to laugh and to always be polite
Make people smile and have a beautiful night
If you're gonna raise a drunk
You might as well do it right

Oh yeah it's a real hard job; a real hard job
Oh yeah it's a real hard job
Oh yeah it's a real real real real real hard job